Leading From My Heart by Bonnie Karen Carter

Stageset: Only me and another woman in a waiting room at a train station 

She is sitting in the opposite corner from where I am standing.

She is facing the wall and looking odd. I ask myself, is she hurt? or just poor and downtrodden? Not well? Hungry? Crazy? I stand unevenly, it appears I have taken on a limp, from her? Through empathy? I hesitate to go over, investigate and ask if she needs help, but I want to know if she is okay? I limp over, a little nervous about how she is going to react or respond. 

When I reach her I ask, are you okay? She faces me silently, untamed and angry, then abruptly limps out of the station waiting room. Startled, I follow her not knowing why. She clearly doesn't want anything to do with me. I am attracted for some reason. But why? She resembles a helpless waif from another time. Upon leaving the station house, to my surprise I see she is quite far down the road. I limp along intently and make good ground. 

Out of nowhere a third being appears. A bird is flying overhead, casting a shadow. It seems huge, maybe it is a condor, I think. Once, I saw one in a zoo. At that time it impressed me as a massive, unusual mythic creature instead of a bird. Observing the bird’s wing span increased my awe of this very strange mythic bird. I then think of Joseph Campbell and universal archetypes, totems, myths and meanings. What is the meaning of the condor totem? I don’t know. I am so in the moment with this woman, bird and myself, I will find out. 

The bird hovers, then leaves. Oddly, its shadow remains. I get used to it. I wear it as a comfortable cloak. I am gaining ground on the woman and don’t know why I am magnetized by her, because I actually am feeling unsafe and compelled at the same time. I reach her and she turns around. Shock! She is beautiful and gentle and kind. She is not the woman I saw in the room, but another person. How is that possible? And neither she nor I limp anymore. I am struck to see on her chest, over her heart region, a large mirror necklace about a dozen inches wide. I look into it; and see my face. Shock! It is beautiful and gentle and kind.  

Oh, now I remember what bird totems do in myths, they bring messages of a higher perspective. 

Bonnie Karen Carter of Grounded in Spirit is an energetic healer/bodyworker, author, artist. Growing up in a stressful environment, she adapted to life by ‘reading’ others for survival. This skill afforded her a vivid imagination and a unique capacity to be a conscious vehicle for information from the M-field.